The Greil Mercenaries and the Sun Block
by PPP SSC
Summary: It's sunny, but for many fair-skinned members of the Greil mercenaries this is a hindrance. Oscar created the sun block, but wishes he knew how to control his colleagues. Instance of Ike/Soren and otherwise gen fic. Contains a vulnerary featurette.


The Greil Mercenaries and the Sun Block

The sun was shining brightly, and all of the Greil mercenaries wanted to go outside in the warm, beautiful day (well, okay, Soren didn't, but Ike insisted it would be good for his mental health). Oscar had concocted a brilliant sun block from scattered herbs—since Titania, Rhys, Shinon, Soren, and Mist all burned rather than tanned, and Rolf's skin and his own had a fragile threshold thereof—unfortunately, he only had prepared enough for those seven. When Ike, Boyd, Gatrie, and Greil started using it, Oscar stopped them. "I only made enough for those who burn. You guys tan, so you don't need it."

"Nonsense," Ike said, "Even tanning should be limited."

"Now Oscar," Boyd said, "Go make a new batch!"

"Fine…" responded the annoyed knight, who went over to prepare more. He left the concoction near the other mercenaries as he went over to rest.

"Uh…Oscar?" Shinon asked, "Titania used the ENTIRE THING!"

"I'm a redhead. We redheads have very sensitive skin…" she responded.

"Titania, ALL of us are redheads!" Shinon shouted while pointing to himself, her, and Rhys.

Oscar went over to prepare more. "Titania, save some for the others this time," he said. He left the concoction near the other mercenaries as he went over to rest.

"AAH!" shrieked out a young but irritable voice, "IKE! Shinon put some in my hair!"

Ike said to Shinon, "This is for your skin."

"Shut up, Ike," Shinon said.

Greil intervened. "Shinon, no being a bully."

"And I just washed my hair too…" Soren griped.

"I'm Soren and I'm a GIRRRL!" Shinon taunted, "I don't want my BOYFRIEND, Ike, to see me with SUN BLOCK in my hair!"

"SHINON!" Greil shouted again. "That's enough!"

"You're an imbecile, Shinon," Soren said, at which point Shinon started rubbing the sun block in Soren's eyes.

"OUCH!" he shouted. Oscar walked over and removed the sun block from Shinon's hand.

"I'm not making you any more until you learn to be responsible with it!" he yelled. He smeared a small amount on Ike's hand. "Here, you take care of Mist and Soren, because they don't deserve to be punished. I'll take care of Rhys because I don't trust Titania with it."

"You want me to rub sun block on Soren?" Ike asked, while blushing hotly. Soren noticed this and reciprocated it.

"If it makes you feel uncomfortable, I could do it…" Oscar said. He couldn't see why Ike had such a problem with this—Ike and Soren were best friends.

"NO! I mean… I'm sure Ike would be happy to oblige…" Soren responded, still blushing.

Greil chuckled, thinking to himself, _it's always the same with childhood friends._

Oscar rubbed sun block on Rhys, who said, "I'm not sure why you don't trust us with the sun block. I wouldn't abuse it and neither would Mist or Soren."

"I just don't want to let Shinon or Titania near it again…" Oscar said.

"But what about Ike and Soren?" Rhys asked, "They're clearly uncomfortable."

"Well," Oscar said, "I offered to rub sun block on Soren for Ike, but Soren didn't like that idea very much. I told Ike to do it, because I knew Soren would let him."

"Yeah," Soren said, "There's absolutely nothing awkward here." Ike rubbed the sun block strangely seductively, but luckily, no one else noticed, _except Soren, _who was now blushing so red that even if he had gotten sunburned no one would have noticed.

Mist got impatient waiting for Ike to finish so she stole the tub from Oscar, before the priest was finished being rubbed. She started rubbing it all over herself. "Mist, give that back," Oscar responded, "I'm busy with Rhys right now."

Mist didn't listen to Oscar. Rolf took it from her and started covering himself in it. Shinon then said, "Yoink!" as he grabbed the tub and began using it to gel his hair.

"Hey!" Gatrie protested, "Save some for others!" He took the tub and rubbed the sun block in as hair gel as well.

"Uh… Oscar," Boyd said, "The sun block is gone."

"That's enough! You guys are all SO immature! I am NOT making you any more, and that is FINAL!" he shouted.

Rolf, Mist, and _Boyd_ started to cry. Oscar immediately resumed his softer side. "Okay, guys, I'll make some more."

Greil stepped in. "No, Oscar, it's not necessary. Rolf, Mist, Titania, Rhys, Soren, and you…"

"Oops," Oscar said, "In all the chaos I forgot to sun block myself! So I guess I'll have to make more."

"May I have some?" Rhys asked, "I was cut a bit short…"

"Of course you may, Rhys," was Oscar's polite response.

"But what about me?" asked Shinon.

"No," Greil said, "Since you were being a bully and wasting the sun block, you have a choice—stay home while the rest of us go out and play, or go outside and risk getting a sunburn.

Shinon was blessed that day with an absolutely gorgeous first-degree sunburn. He looked like Gareth, the retainer to Prince Kurthnaga, who was famed for having the world's longest-lasting first-degree sunburn at six hundred and forty years. And Rhys was rubbing medicinal herbs on him to soothe his pain. But the other people with fair and delicate skin kept their fair complexions. And Soren, despite being opposed to it at first, wished this sunlight came around more often.

Oscar always made sure to make a batch that was tanner-proof, Bogart-proof, bully-proof, hair-gel-proof, and impatience-proof from then on.

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